I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize