Cold hands, warm shart.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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