She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize