after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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