I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
no, he came in my armpit
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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