...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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