my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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