Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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