At least make sure they are 18
Why
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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