ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize