My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just crazy horny about you
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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