The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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