Texts From Last Night

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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls

  (1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome

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  (306): Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls (1-306): I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome http://tfl.nu/f4ni
  Replies (23) Good night (4610) Bad night (635) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.

  (1-615): View more from Tennessee

  Anal.

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  (615): I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people. (1-615): Anal. http://tfl.nu/eagl
  Replies (23) Good night (3298) Bad night (762) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.

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  (630): week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl. http://tfl.nu/1sz9
  Replies (37) Good night (4492) Bad night (679) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.

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  (919): Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd. http://tfl.nu/5f3i
  Replies (64) Good night (8737) Bad night (716) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being

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  (440): You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being http://tfl.nu/lse1
  Replies (39) Good night (1618) Bad night (3848) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."

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  (908): don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..." http://tfl.nu/9x9f
  Replies (16) Good night (1900) Bad night (3639) Order T-Shirt
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?

  (1-816): View more from Missouri

  Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.

  (816): View more from Missouri

  ...... wtf.

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  (816): Where'd you guys get the alcohol from? (1-816): Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower. (816): ...... wtf. http://tfl.nu/k9gx
  Replies (25) Good night (7130) Bad night (991)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome

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  (609): You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome http://tfl.nu/6r0p
  Replies (7) Good night (3878) Bad night (691) Order T-Shirt
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house

  (713): View more from Texas

  So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?

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  (832): The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house (713): So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh? http://tfl.nu/xori
  Replies (15) Good night (3739) Bad night (610)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.

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  (336): Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box. (336): Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark. http://tfl.nu/oail
  Replies (9) Good night (1369) Bad night (452)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.

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  (416): We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time. http://tfl.nu/y0p3
  Replies (2) Good night (1137) Bad night (400) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.

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  (612): Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all. http://tfl.nu/jmi7
  Replies (1) Good night (657) Bad night (738) Order T-Shirt
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.

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  (423): Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina. http://tfl.nu/4jzk
  Replies (6) Good night (1551) Bad night (329) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again

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  (773): Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again http://tfl.nu/5np3
  Replies (2) Good night (677) Bad night (280) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay

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  (214): I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay http://tfl.nu/b2gf
  Replies (2) Good night (266) Bad night (579) Order T-Shirt

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