So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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