okay pat passed out under dana's car
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize