So drunk its hurt
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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