How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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