I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
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My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
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Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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