Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize