So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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