After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
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