very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
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I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
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I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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