After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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