I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will never coherently bang her
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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