The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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