so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
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If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
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I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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