the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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