I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize