Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
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