Got a toothbrush?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
is it fun? or sober?
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