Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
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