Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
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