Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
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