so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize