Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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