i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
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worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
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Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
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