Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
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On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I could fuck to npr.
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Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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