She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize