Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
She told me I should be a condom model.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Come on in and take your pants off
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