Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
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