they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Sext me about skeletons
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize