too bad you live with your parents still
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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