oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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