dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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