did you get engaged???
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize