I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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