? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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