i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
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