its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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