THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize